Behind Closed Doors: A Case for Susie Sunshine

Optimism is a mindset and a conscious choice.

As a stress management speaker, I espouse concepts such as:

Look on the bright side!

Choose optimism!

Remember to laugh!

Still, positivity doesn’t always come naturally to me. I struggle to apply principles I encourage others to embrace. It’s not easy to stay positive. I still find myself complaining to my younger sister Cindy about minor things and she will wryly say, “Are we stressing, Miss Stress Management Specialist?” Guilty as charged.

Sparingly sweat the small stuff

I’m not suggesting that people go around being upbeat all the time. No one always reacts with a good attitude when their car keys are lost or their furnace goes out. Sure, it’s good to not sweat the small stuff, but it’s okay to do it occasionally. That’s why we have sweat glands.

But people who are optimistic are more productive. They say “Why not?” while pessimists say “Why bother?” All the great inventors were resilient optimists. Thomas Edison tried 6,000 different elements before he developed the light bulb. Imagine trying and failing at something 6,000 times! Think about his poor friends around Try No. 4,000: “Tom. Dude. Give it up. Candles aren’t that bad. Let’s go shoot some hoops.”

No patience for pity parties

My mom was an eternal optimist — a veritable Susie Sunshine. Occasionally I found her positivity annoying. When all I wanted was just to have a big pity party, she was always telling me to look on the bright side. No matter how bad things were, she’d tell me how much worse it could be.

Once I was complaining to her because I thought I had fat arms. She said, “You think you’ve got problems. Think of the people with no arms at all!” I said, “Well that’s one way to lose 10 pounds!” Just looking on that bright side, Mom!

Mom had no patience for chronic whiners. A lady in our small town named Marge Thompson complained constantly. If you asked Marge how she was doing, you’d need to prepare yourself for a litany of aches, pains and grievances.

As a young child, for reasons I don’t fully understand, I enjoyed irritating my mother from time to time. Every time we ran into Marge, I felt compelled to ask, “How are you doing, Mrs. Thompson?”

“Ohhh. Not so good...”

Thirty long minutes later, Mom would drag me to the car and admonish me. “Stop asking Marge Thompson how she’s doing!”

While my message of positivity rings hollow to me at times, these principles do hold up — regardless of the nature of the challenge. They are more important during difficult times when the temptation runs high to catastrophize and imagine the worst possible scenario for the future. Negativity can put us in a state of fear and anxiety that makes it impossible to see the blessings all around us.

Lean toward optimism whenever possible and realize it might not always be your natural state. It takes vigilance and practice. We must be mindful of our thoughts and reactions throughout the day. Optimism is a mindset and a conscious choice. The more we see how a spirit of optimism leads to happiness and productivity, the easier it will be to make it part of our daily lives. In a world of Marge Thompsons, endeavor to be a Susie Sunshine. OSM